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The Boogerman Loop Trail has to be one of the coolest sounding trail names of any trail in the entire Smoky Mountains, perhaps the entire universe. Even trails on fucking Mars couldn’t sound as cool as the Boogerman Loop Trail. Apollo could so kick the shit out of either of those Mars Rovers. Spirit vs. The Master of Disaster? Get in the real world… Apollo would destroy. Even Dan Rafael would agree with that shit.

Anyways, the Boogerman Loop Trail is a decently strenuous trail hike for normal folks that takes around 3-4 hours to complete. (Apollo trail runs it in 10 minutes. Seriously.) Apollo loves this trail… serious old-growth forests, divine waterfalls and creeks, and a generally low amount of traffic.

Trail running on the Boogerman Loop Trail in the Great Smoky Mountains National Park.

The Boogerman Loop trail was named after Robert “Boogerman Palmer”, one of the early settlers in the Great Smoky Mountains, before they made it a national park. Back in the day, asshole lumber companies tried buying up all the land in order to make some ass cash for themselves, but Boogerman refused to hell and back to sell his land and essentially told all the lumber companies to fuck them selfs.

By telling the lumber companies to eat shit, The Boogerman left us all with insanely awesome, massive Apollo-bicep-esque old-growth hardwoods to enjoy the absolute heck out of. Apollo sends a HUGE thank you to the late, great, Mr. Palmer. What a rad dude.